Worst Films of 2008

by James Evans

The Happening
If this doesn’t convince people that M. Night is insane then nothing will. Mark Wahlberg has the worst scene of the year when he speaks to a plant. Yes, he speaks to a plant. You have to see it to believe it.

Will Smith
No, it’s not a movie. He just has two terrible movies this year, so I thought I would throw them together. I thought Hancock was bad and that nothing could top it, but along came Seven Pounds. Not worse, but just as bad in a different way. Death by jellyfish? WTF? And Hancock, how pathetic. He has been whining for 80 years because nobody loves him? I am not excited to see what he does next.

Clone Wars
Lucas didn’t have anything to do with this? Subpar animation and a baby Hutt. What a joke.

Changeling
This is how I imagine an interview at an insane asylum.
Interviewer: ” So, Mr. Evans, are you evil?”
Me: “Why yes, yes I am evil!”
Interviewer: “Welcome aboard!”

10,000 B.C.
Really?

The Day the Earth Stood Still
Terrible remake and one that never needed to be made.

Deception
Could they give you anymore hints as to what is coming next? And please explain to me the ending. No way in hell would Ewan McGregor have gotten out of the country. Speaking of Ewan, what the hell was up with Casandra’s Dream? I thought Woody was back on track until this came out.

88 Minutes
This is the funniest movie that was not supposed to be funny. Al Pacino is laughably bad in this supposed thriller that is not thrilling in the least.

Eagle Eye
I really wanted to like this movie, but it was just too stupid and beyond believable even for a dumb movie. Another movie I wanted to like was Max Payne. I like Mark Wahlberg, so how the hell did he end up in two movies in my worst list?

Strange Wilderness
Sometimes when you watch a dumb comedy you can just shut off your brain and go with it so I try not to be too hard on these movies. Then one like this comes along to ruin my day. The scene with Steve Zahn and the turkey is the second worst of the year behind Mark and the tree.

Another terrible comedy I wasted my time on was College. Do not rent this movie no matter what!
And one for the women. No, not The Women, although that was bad too. The worst chick flick was Mad Money. It would be pure torture for me to have to ever watch this again.