Irish Drinking

by Sean Rein

Earlier this year, my wife and I took a two-week vacation to Ireland. Since I have been back, I have been asked at least 100 times, “Why did you go to Ireland?”

Do I have to point out that my name is Sean? My wife’s maiden name is Sheehan! WE’RE IRISH! Plus, who doesn’t want to have a Guinness in an Irish pub?

People are idiots.

The truth is, Ireland is a great place to visit, even if you are not Irish. The people are friendly and speak English…well, the ones you can understand speak English. The weather isn’t bad, and, yes, it isn’t hard to find a pub. In fact, National Geographic named the Dingle Peninsula “most beautiful place on Earth.”

I truly went to Ireland because my wife had never been, and I enjoyed it so much the first time that I couldn’t say no. And, yes, my favorite part was drinking in the pubs. That’s why I want to highlight some of my favorite pubs from my last visit home.

Durty Nelly’s – Bunratty
I went to Durty Nelly’s when I went to Ireland the first time in 1982. It is the quintessential dark Irish pub. The floors are wood, the celling is low, they were burning peat in the fireplace, and the drinks and conversations flow freely. When I was there in 1982 I was 12 years old and there were no laws against underage drinking.

My drink recommendation: Guinness. It was good in 1982 and still was in 2008.

Dick Mac’s – Dingle
It’s known as “The Last Pew” because it it directly across the street from the Catholic church. In fact, the main stairs of the church empty out to the curb, and the entrance to Dick Mac’s is directly across the narrow street. A guy could walk out of church and take about ten steps before he was bellied up to the bar in Dick Mac’s. The place used to be a leatherworks back in the day. So, a guy could bring in his saddle and have a pint while the leatherworker repaired it.

While drinking at Dick Mac’s, I was informed that it was not against the law to pick and be in possession of “magic mushrooms.” I was also told by the locals that the grounds of the Pitch & Putt were the best place to go hunting for the little delights. It made me want to take up golf.

My drink recommendation: Guinness. It goes good with mushrooms.

Foxy John’s – Dingle
This might have been the best pub I visited. It was a pub on one side and a hardware store on the other.

My drink recommendation: Guinness. It tastes good when you are looking at hammers.

O’Connor’s – Kenmare
This was a cozy little place in Kenmare. It was perfect for ducking in out of the rain and hoisting a pint. It was so warm and inviting that a stray dog wandered in and begged for food. The barmaid shooed him out but as soon as her back was turned, he wandered right back in.

My drink recommendation: Guinness. Stray dogs like me love it.

Florry Bott’s – Kenmare
This place was a real tiny crapbox, but it was quaint in its own way. When I went to the back of the place to inspect the plumbing, I found the keg room. I love keg rooms.

My drink recommendation: Guinness. They have a room full of it!

Morrissey’s – Dublin
This place was great! We went in there on three separate days, and, every time, the same old guy was in the corner watching horse racing and had the table covered with papers. We spent every evening here watching horse racing, hurling and Premier League soccer.

My drink recommendation: Paulaner Hefeweizen. Hey, Dublin is a lot closer to Bavaria than St. Paul, Minnesota is!

Sheehan’s – Dublin
Please! It’s my wife’s family’s place! What more do you want? My drink recommendation: Guinness. When in Rome.

Matt Malloy’s – Westport
Matt Malloy was the flautist for The Chieftains. There was a Grammy sitting behind the bar. The rumor was that he would drop by often and play with whatever band was on stage. We actually heard an old guy singing Irish songs badly in here. Every pub had a stumbling drunk and the one in Matt Malloy’s decided to sing.

My drink recommendation: Guinness. It soothes the ears.

I kept track of my drinking while I was on the island, and in 15 days I drank 70 pints of Guinness. I’m very proud of that, and I know that my Irish relatives, dead and alive, feel the same way. I only gained 2 pounds on the trip and I attribute that to Guinness’s low carb content and the low-calorie foods I ate in the pubs.

My advice to you…go to Ireland and drink your way around the island. I did and it was the best vacation I’ve ever had.

2 Comments

• 

  By Neza, January 18, 2009 @ 12:15 am

  Jesus Christ, …So what would you say was your favorite beer?
  And I’ve been meaning to ask you, Why did you go to Ireland, anyway?
  See you down at the corner.
  -Neza

• 

  By Neza, January 21, 2009 @ 5:41 pm

  I’m just jealous…that was a great report.

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